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"I want you to take the time to learn the Scattergood Mantra. Jane is always right. I will listen to Jane. I will not ignore Jane's recommendations. Jane is God. And if this ever, EVER happens again, Jane will personally rip your lungs out."

In her college years, Jane became very successful by writing a book about Shakespeare. Unfortunately, later in her life this became an unhealthy obsession leading to the development of psychosis and eventual institutionalization. Much of her life has slowly become centered around Shakespeare. For example, she once taught a class on death, sex, and Shakespeare, that started to deteriorate to a class only about Shakespeare. Since her release from the institution in Independence Iowa, she has indoctrinated many Scattergood students into joining her cult, which mostly centers around reciting Shakespeare quotes in unison. The Scattergood Admin, however, can not step in because of her major financial contributions to the school. She has also garnered the attentions of Bruce Whiteman and Dave Reeve, although those feelings are not (as far as The Admin can tell) reciprocated.

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